.Convertibles.

I have the mustang out today...it's crazy--I sink into that seat and it's like sinking into Chris. Good crazy of course. He loved that car. In fact, it was his dream car and how amazing that he had it before he died....he always thought he looked good in it too and he was right....he sure did.

I don't drive it all that often--truth be told, I really didn't love it the way he did...it's a bit too low to the ground for my taste and convertibles mess up my hair but I figure if I'm paying the insurance on it, and it takes up garage space, I should use it. I even took the dogs to daycare in it this morning--that had to be the sight. Finley had his head stuck out this tiny triangle window opening and Maya was in the front seat blocking my side mirror and trying to figure out how she too could get her head through that small little opening....Chris would take her for rides in the mustang and the side windows were her favorite-just big enough for her head to fit through. That's about all there was room for in the car this morning--the dogs, my purse, and me. While it certainly wasn't as packed as a clown car-it sure was a challenge compared to my SUV....but, Chris loved that car.

That car, lovingly named Trooper, is 9 this year and I have no desire to get rid of it or trade it in....even if we have a love/hate relationship. You see, I love looking at it, I love the idea of a convertible and the summer breeze with the top down....but I hate that it doesn't suit my needs and that it messes up my hair :) Chris always made fun of me for trying to keep it all looking somewhat decent while driving....except whenever we got from point A to point B it usually resulted in tangles and scared children at the sight....and he quickly reminded me he loved me anyway.

What a statement. I love you anyway....even when your hair is a mess and you get out on the wrong side of the bed....even when you over-react sometimes....even when you make mistakes....even when you laugh at the wrong moments....even when . . .

He loved me even though I wasn't perfect. Even though I had a lot to learn....and even though I often tried and failed. He cared even though I sometimes got upset easily and even though I didn't always know the right thing to say or do.

So, maybe I can convert a smidge and love Trooper even though it doesn't really suit my needs...even though it messes up my hair....even though it's nothing I would have chosen for myself....because, really, it's not going anywhere....so we might as well compromise.