Live Your Love.

I believe in being happy.

I know, it doesn't seem all that profound at first but it really is when you step back and think about it. It is so much easier to carry the weight of every bad thing and experience....so much easier than to carry only a smile in your heart and a hop in your step. I recognize fully that happiness is not always attainable and that you must believe in what you're doing and where you want to be for it to work....and--mostly--that it is a conscious effort every day.

I am fueled by my emotions...every little thing rattles me some days and other days I feel like I can take on the world. It is rare when both of those worlds collide and I find a balance that lasts more than a few days or even hours...but I can assure you that the balance does exist and I am going to be better at making it so. It's part of choosing to be happy.

I'm learning the hard way that being happy is more a choice than I ever thought it was before. It is not just a chain of events that falls right into place. I am consciously choosing to love and accept every blessing and hardship that is coming my way...and I am also consciously choosing what it is that I will feel sadness over, loss with, and ultimately the energy I will allow to accompany me on this journey. I am responsible for that and that alone.

This leads me to another belief. I believe in owning your actions and ultimately who you are.

Again, not that profound....but accountability, within yourself, is crucial. I control the fact that I sometimes have bitten off more than I can chew...but I own it every single moment. I am owning that my own shortcomings are self-limited and not because of anyone or anything else. I own every mistake, every triumph, and every moment of bliss that I allow in my life....that while I am overwhelmed at times and feel like I have my "hands full" I need to recognize that as an abundance of blessings...and how absolutely amazing is that?!

The power of thought and perspective is huge. I own those too. I can allow myself to see things in positive or negative ways and while there is certainly room for both at appropriate times--the point is that it must be the appropriate time for both and owning those moments is crucial for the balance to come back.

This morning, while I was getting ready, I was completely indecisive on what to wear and every time I looked in the mirror, I found fault with something somewhere. In a true this-only-happens-in-the-movies moment, I decided I was going to own this outfit, especially the sweater that I normally would never wear, and I walked out of the house and didn't think about it again until I got compliment after compliment on it. I recognized it wasn't just the sweater...it was deciding to own the fact that my choice to see past the imperfections I so quickly noticed in the mirror just don't matter as much as I think--especially with a good sweater :)

Every action, word, and thought has a reaction--good or bad. Of course I want them to be good...but we are all human and with that comes pride and jealousy and those very things spark the negativity that I am so consciously choosing to avoid....but, on a bad day and even on the really good days, life happens....we act without thinking....we choose words that don't reflect our heart....and we forget that people's feelings matter. It is likely that I will not leave behind a legacy with my name engraved on it....but it is more likely that you will always associate how I made you feel with a negative or positive connotation....that, when I'm not in the room and my name comes up, you will have a distinct feeling about me.

Because of that very sentiment, I am choosing to be kind, happy, and fully myself.

Again, not that profound--not a single big word in that sentence--but the effect of those very things has the ability to ripple...to inspire...and to challenge others...which leads me to believe that, often, big words are not necessary when it comes to matters of the heart....for, even the smallest of children know the power of short, sincere sentences like I love you and I'm sorry.

Live your love. Own it. Choose happy. Be kind.